Saturday, April 18, 2009

Have you had your shots?

I just wanted to share with you - the scariest thing I've had to do in a very long time...

This season marks the second spring that my husband and I have spent in our new house. Last year we didn't pay too much attention to the front and back gardens for a few reasons.

1) We had just dropped a disgusting amount of money on buying the house and needed to save up again for awhile before taking on any big, unnecessary projects.

2) The gardens were still holding up pretty well from the previous owners (an older retired couple with enough time on their hands to make themselves a pretty sweet set-up including two apple trees, a rose bush, some vegetables and more flowers & bushes than any human could ever need)

3) We're way to lazy to do anything as constructive as gardening.

4) Did I mention we're seriously lazy?

So in our first 12 months living here the biggest change we made was a lovely garden gnome - which we placed in the front to greet all our new neighbors! Of course, the gnome isn't even ours; it belongs to our roommate (thanks Dawn!) but still. The problem now is that after a year and a half of not tending to all the lovelies that the previous owner left .... our yard had become a jungle. I'm not exaggerating here folks; it was scary to walk from our back door to our gate. I'm pretty sure there would be at least a dozen shots you would want to get before even stepping out the door. There were very few brave souls willing to take the risk and I was not one of those people.

I'll post some pictures later but to make a long story short - I pulled out the necessary tools from our shed: rake, shovel, hedge clippers etc. and prepared to attack! But when I picked up the gardening gloves that had been sitting in the dark, cold shed all winter ... I froze. Let me explain exactly how the thoughts in my head evolved:

Do I really want to stick my fingers in these things? What kind of ooey gooey thing might have crawled up one of the fingers and made itself a home? A bee? A Wasp? A beetle? A spider?? Surely there is a Brown-Recluse just waiting for my juicey finger to come creeping up inside. And then what? My husband is at Home Depot (God only knows how long that trip might take) so I'm going to get bitten by a Brown F'ing Recluse and no one is going to know! And what's worse ... once he does get home, who knows how long it might be before he finds my dead body lost in the jungle that is now our backyard!!

Now... I could have just cut the hedges without gloves - but seriously - these hands are far too delicate for that jazz. I'd rather risk the deadly spider bite than get a blister. But it took me a solid four-minutes of internal struggle to come to that conclusion. Who knew gardening was so dangerous?


Buggys April 18, 2009 at 5:14 PM  

You speak a lot of truth Kimosabe!I can't wait for the pics.

Jessica May 13, 2009 at 9:59 PM  

I love moving that thing around to see if you notice it moves on it own.

Anonymous,  June 18, 2009 at 1:29 PM  

OMG you are too funny... I caught you doing yard work out front! I was about to say those old people are rolling over in their graves because you ruined their yard, but than I remembered that they are alive and living in Delaware... :) Jaclyn

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